Attached: Are you Anxious, Avoidant or Secure? How the science of adult attachment can help you find – and keep – love Paperback – 22 Aug. 2019

Liked all the different aspects examples and clear explanations, would recommend this book to anyone who's every wanted to improve their relationships or relationship patterns, and learn to understand themselves better.

The material in this book is amazing. Sometimes a little too dumbed down and a little too pleasing (think drama story telling) to the larger audience ( I enjoy more hard science and facts), the material however is undeniable and with good nuggets of insight to help self reflection and understanding.Having been a student and advocate for attachment theory for a while, I like how this book helps bring it more to the common vermicular and daily discourse. This only helps raise the bar for all of us.Even having understood a lot on this earlier I still learnt loads so can recommend this book to others.Wish you all well on your relationship journeys.

This is a really interesting read in lots of ways. It gives a pretty concise and detailed view on how to help make sense of the complications that can arise when relationships break down. It s based on the 1960's theory of attachment, which basically states that humans are hard wired to attach to eachother, but depending on the early years experience, do it in different ways. It doesn't judge one way to be better, but it does offer answers as to why some relationships can sink under pressure or committment issues, or why the communication is dysfunctional. Important to know is that it's fine and natural to be attached and expect attachment to be reciprocal, or to want to be the constant support to a non appreciative partner, as the key lies in understanding what kind of attachment you personally have. Of course there are degrees of influence within this, ie, genes, upbringing, culture,etc, but the different types are really interesting and can explain some conundrums, like why, ironically enough, secure partners carry on supporting insecure partners, even to their detriment, and so on. There's quite a bit of information here, but much of it is quite progressive and applied to lots of common relationship pitfalls. If you're interested in trying to take an objective look at yourself, and wondering why stuff 's gone really wrong, (again!) Instead of blaming yourself constantly, you might just find a good few answers in here. Not just that, it might be a relief to hear how you can look at emotions in an understandable light. If you're seeking spiritual enlightenment, this isn't the book for you....but if you're wanting an intellectual, rational, and fairly objective view about what's really behind common relationship crashes, then this is a valuable read with real insights offered to modern problems. It even has some tips on the warning signs ......and more importantly, why we ignore them so often, which again, can be an insight previously unthought of. Also, this book is easy to read. It's clearly and logically set out, and has some good questions to help the reader think about their own style of attachment, and therefore hopefully gain some practical insights that might just help.

I can now first time see and understand where I have gone wrong with my relationships. Thank you for the great book.

I’ve spent most of my adult life as an avoidant, and only when learning about attachment did I realise this and wow, what a journey of reflection that initiated. This book gives a superb account and clear explanation of how so much of our behaviour in relationships are not down to the stories we tell ourselves. The examples of couples they use in the book really help put things in perspective, showing how insecurities act like a little homunculus sitting inside us directing our actions. As stated in the Epilogue, achievement in relationships is so often left to chance, whereas success in any other area of life is achieved through knowledge, attachment theory is an invaluable part of that knowledge for relationships.The only downside I would say, is that the theory is approached by the book in what could be seen as a little too generic. There is also little accounting for the nuances of the LGBTQ community but that can be expected given the time it was written, and ultimately, a lot still applies.Overall, Attached is a must read for anyone who wants to be more successful at relationships and is tired of winning it.

I like how the authors included some activities to test your understanding with different scenarios, including common disputes. This helps to relate the teachings with real relationship situations and really engrains the information.The reality checks of this book have already helped my self reflection, Ill continue to refer to this book for secure help from now on :)

A good book although let down by being badly scanned. It was impossible to do a questionnaire as the instructions were missing and the scan was of a used book where the questionnaire had already been done.

A clear and we'll structured exploration of attachment styles and they impact upon relationships. Useful professional development as a therapist.